After the sales of flat was complete....now they tell us we need to pay for the upgrading fees...it's over $16k!! One of the rare times in my life that I'm so upset that I joined Hun to write a complain letter to HDB.
On our Official Sales Order, it states "Upgrading Costs: $0"....now they want us to pay over $16k. Not fair!!
I mean they definitely know that upgrading works are being done to the unit what...can't they just be abit more hardworking and work out the cost for us and inform us officially? Even if they can't determine the exact cost, as least give us official notification before we buy the unit that we will need to bear upgrading costs right?
How can they just call up one fine day as tell us "oh btw, u need to pay $16k for the upgrading"....hello...our OFFICIAL SALES ORDER states $0 leh! Quite pissed at the whole thing...
Not that we dun wanna pay...but u gotta let us be prepared right? $16k leh! Not $16 dollars! we just signed an agreement less than 2 weeks ago, and now u tell us we need to pay $16k more? Just 2 weeks ago your agreement states $0!!
Very pissed...this is not the kind of standards I expect from a government body at all...not that something unexpected cropped up...the upgrading works have been going on for months lor...u mean u can't even just give us a simple letter to say we need to bear upgrading costs? U mean during the WIS u still cannot decide whether we need to bear the upgrading costs? Can u just add a simple line to the handbook "Unit price excludes upgrading works" or "Upgrading costs to be paid by owner"
Anyway, wrote in liao....let's see who reply and what they say...
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
Friday, March 16, 2007
Wedding Stress...
Undeniably, I'm stressed about the wedding. Not that I wasn't stressed previously, but previously the stress comes from the preparation and what we have to do.
This time it's different. It's the emotional stress of this whole event. It's not easy playing a supporting role I tell you...cos you have to support 2 persons, the one you're supporting and yourself too. So all you gals out there who are stressing about your wedding, remember to always thank God for the good health and well-being of all your family members and your partner's family members too!
Why the stress? I guess it comes from repeatedly reminding yourself of the situation now and how it's not the time to give in to your own temper tantrums or expect your partner to give in to you. It's the pains of learning to manage your own emotions so that you can truly be a support and not a liability to your partner in his time of need.
It's a painful and often lonely place to be. Knowing that you are giving so much more than before but telling yourself that not to expect returns...and not getting upset with him about it. You think you are suffering? Think about him...he's not any better, if not in a worse situation than you are in. But always remind yourself to see the efforts that he is still putting in to love you as best as he can though he's in pain. And learning to overlook slip-ups from him. He's not perfect, and you just gotta accept that! No point letting something small trigger a big reaction.
Assure him as much as you can that he has your permission to take his time to do the things he need to to. Learning to let go perhaps? Yes, you'll feel the loss, but that's temporary. Remind yourself that perhaps years from now when you look back, you'll be glad you gave him space, and he'll surely appreciate you for it too.
He's also learning...and I see his growth. He's learned to handle multiple stresses at the same time, and learning to see the needs of others through his own pain. And he's learnt to appreciate his loved ones even more! And in brief moments, tho we seem to be letting go of each other more, we also seem to be loving each other more...in actions, not just words.
It's a learning journey...perhaps we just had to learn it earlier than others. But again, if I had a chance to decide, I wouldn't want my wedding preps any other way.
Look on the bright side.....it's a storm we're facing, with Christ in it. Not everyone has a chance to weather such a storm and learn from it. It's a precious lesson from God. After the storm comes the rainbow...only if I hang on all the way till the storm blows over. And that's what I'll do! I certainly don't wanna go through all this heartache and pain for nothing! I'll make sure I get something good out of it :)
This time it's different. It's the emotional stress of this whole event. It's not easy playing a supporting role I tell you...cos you have to support 2 persons, the one you're supporting and yourself too. So all you gals out there who are stressing about your wedding, remember to always thank God for the good health and well-being of all your family members and your partner's family members too!
Why the stress? I guess it comes from repeatedly reminding yourself of the situation now and how it's not the time to give in to your own temper tantrums or expect your partner to give in to you. It's the pains of learning to manage your own emotions so that you can truly be a support and not a liability to your partner in his time of need.
It's a painful and often lonely place to be. Knowing that you are giving so much more than before but telling yourself that not to expect returns...and not getting upset with him about it. You think you are suffering? Think about him...he's not any better, if not in a worse situation than you are in. But always remind yourself to see the efforts that he is still putting in to love you as best as he can though he's in pain. And learning to overlook slip-ups from him. He's not perfect, and you just gotta accept that! No point letting something small trigger a big reaction.
Assure him as much as you can that he has your permission to take his time to do the things he need to to. Learning to let go perhaps? Yes, you'll feel the loss, but that's temporary. Remind yourself that perhaps years from now when you look back, you'll be glad you gave him space, and he'll surely appreciate you for it too.
He's also learning...and I see his growth. He's learned to handle multiple stresses at the same time, and learning to see the needs of others through his own pain. And he's learnt to appreciate his loved ones even more! And in brief moments, tho we seem to be letting go of each other more, we also seem to be loving each other more...in actions, not just words.
It's a learning journey...perhaps we just had to learn it earlier than others. But again, if I had a chance to decide, I wouldn't want my wedding preps any other way.
Look on the bright side.....it's a storm we're facing, with Christ in it. Not everyone has a chance to weather such a storm and learn from it. It's a precious lesson from God. After the storm comes the rainbow...only if I hang on all the way till the storm blows over. And that's what I'll do! I certainly don't wanna go through all this heartache and pain for nothing! I'll make sure I get something good out of it :)
Thursday, March 15, 2007
More milestones
Did I blog about getting my keys? I don't remember...
Anyway, we got the keys to our flat last friday :) And the next day, we showed our potentiona contractor the unit and also cleared out mailbox which was jammed with mails for the previous owner.
Yesterday, we signed with our contractor and paid the deposit. He'll be doing the bank loan thingy for us. So for now, we'll wait for his drawing to be out. Wonder how it would turn out :) Before we finally decided, we went through a few rounds of calculations and discussion to decide if we wanna take out more things to cut cost. But in the end we decided to keep everything...we won't be saving that much anyway....and I feel maybe we can just pamper ourselves a little lah...hehe
This sat we'll be having our electrical supplies turned on, after which the reno work can officially start. We'll be getting pastor to bless and sanctify the house first before the reno works begin. Just to seek God's blessings to oversee the whole renovation works.
Things seem to be getting better, and our spirits are slightly lifted since 2 weeks ago. 2 days ago when I went to see Hun's mom, I was so happy to see that she is more alert now compared to the last time I saw her. However there's a bit of swelling on her head where her op was done. Today Hun told me that the docs would need to drain the fluid out...shan't go into details of how it would be done. Felt my spirits dampened...just when we saw improvement, something like this happens.
Guess if I could feel it, Hun and his family would feel it even stronger. We can just hope in the Lord and keep putting our faith in Him.
But I'm still glad we're going through this...cos I feel that we've both grown in our relationship. This experience will surely prepare us for a possibly even bigger challenge that we might face after we're married. For now, I feel I'm learning what love is really about...what is it to put the other person first, what is means when the bible says "Love is patient, love is kind". How it feels to give when you know the other person is not able to give as much.
I can't say that I'm the happiest bride-to-be, but certainly learning to be peaceful and trusting the Lord, and finding my strength in His joy. I won't say I'm happy, but yet I rejoice for this precious experience, and rejoice that I have to priviledge to weather this storm with Hun. It's not easy, but it's not beyond our ability to cope either.
With Christ in the vessel we can smile at the storm"...is not longer just a sunday school song to me :)
Anyway, we got the keys to our flat last friday :) And the next day, we showed our potentiona contractor the unit and also cleared out mailbox which was jammed with mails for the previous owner.
Yesterday, we signed with our contractor and paid the deposit. He'll be doing the bank loan thingy for us. So for now, we'll wait for his drawing to be out. Wonder how it would turn out :) Before we finally decided, we went through a few rounds of calculations and discussion to decide if we wanna take out more things to cut cost. But in the end we decided to keep everything...we won't be saving that much anyway....and I feel maybe we can just pamper ourselves a little lah...hehe
This sat we'll be having our electrical supplies turned on, after which the reno work can officially start. We'll be getting pastor to bless and sanctify the house first before the reno works begin. Just to seek God's blessings to oversee the whole renovation works.
Things seem to be getting better, and our spirits are slightly lifted since 2 weeks ago. 2 days ago when I went to see Hun's mom, I was so happy to see that she is more alert now compared to the last time I saw her. However there's a bit of swelling on her head where her op was done. Today Hun told me that the docs would need to drain the fluid out...shan't go into details of how it would be done. Felt my spirits dampened...just when we saw improvement, something like this happens.
Guess if I could feel it, Hun and his family would feel it even stronger. We can just hope in the Lord and keep putting our faith in Him.
5 Why are you downcast, O my soul?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
for I will yet praise him,
my Savior and 6 my God.
My soul is downcast within me;
therefore I will remember you
from the land of the Jordan,
the heights of Hermon—from Mount Mizar.
11 Why are you downcast, O my soul?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
for I will yet praise him,
my Savior and my God.
But I'm still glad we're going through this...cos I feel that we've both grown in our relationship. This experience will surely prepare us for a possibly even bigger challenge that we might face after we're married. For now, I feel I'm learning what love is really about...what is it to put the other person first, what is means when the bible says "Love is patient, love is kind". How it feels to give when you know the other person is not able to give as much.
I can't say that I'm the happiest bride-to-be, but certainly learning to be peaceful and trusting the Lord, and finding my strength in His joy. I won't say I'm happy, but yet I rejoice for this precious experience, and rejoice that I have to priviledge to weather this storm with Hun. It's not easy, but it's not beyond our ability to cope either.
With Christ in the vessel we can smile at the storm"...is not longer just a sunday school song to me :)
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
Wedding preps are underway...
Yes, the preps are still going on, and we're likely to proceed as planned. Yesterday we showed Hun's dad the wedding invitation cards proof. I was given the green light to proceed with the printing.
This friday, we'll be going down to HDB to complete the procedures and get our keys to the flat. Thereafter, we'll be going down to BE to confirm the layout of our wedding album before it is sent for printing. In the evening, we plan the meet the ID to see what he has designed for our home.
It's a very different feeling this time. Not as exciting and over the top as previously. It's a mixture of happiness in the midst of sadness. I can see Hun is really trying hard, and I believe he is happy but yet sad at the same time. Guess it's the same for me too...happy that we got the flat we want, happy that our album actually turned out quite nice, but yet I'm sad to see Hun so sad and moody.
It's really a tough time for him, so I really appreciate every effort he makes in making sure that our wedding can still go on smoothly. I pray that he will continue to be strengthened and comforted by the Lord in the midst of this challenging period. I also pray that Hun's mom will get better by leaps and bounds each day and be blessed with a miraculous recovery to health in Jesus' Name!
Meanwhile, I also pray for myself to have to strength to support Hun through this difficult time and help him with the preps as much as I can.
"With Christ in the vessel we can smile at the storm..."
This friday, we'll be going down to HDB to complete the procedures and get our keys to the flat. Thereafter, we'll be going down to BE to confirm the layout of our wedding album before it is sent for printing. In the evening, we plan the meet the ID to see what he has designed for our home.
It's a very different feeling this time. Not as exciting and over the top as previously. It's a mixture of happiness in the midst of sadness. I can see Hun is really trying hard, and I believe he is happy but yet sad at the same time. Guess it's the same for me too...happy that we got the flat we want, happy that our album actually turned out quite nice, but yet I'm sad to see Hun so sad and moody.
It's really a tough time for him, so I really appreciate every effort he makes in making sure that our wedding can still go on smoothly. I pray that he will continue to be strengthened and comforted by the Lord in the midst of this challenging period. I also pray that Hun's mom will get better by leaps and bounds each day and be blessed with a miraculous recovery to health in Jesus' Name!
Meanwhile, I also pray for myself to have to strength to support Hun through this difficult time and help him with the preps as much as I can.
"With Christ in the vessel we can smile at the storm..."
Monday, March 05, 2007
Faith
"Faith" = "For All, I Trust Him"
This is what we really need now...or maybe I need it even more. Thank God for Hun's mother quick recovery from her surgery. It is already a testimony to God!
Right now, we're faced with uncertainties about our wedding plans. We do not wish to cancel or postpone it. So we're praying and believing that God is in control of our wedding. Yesterday I was encouraged by Dad's prayer for our wedding during family prayer time.
He reminded me that our wedding date, venue and guests were appointed by God himself. So He will provide the means to bring it to completion. Provision means a whole lot more to me now...previously, it was simply finances. But now, I'm believing that my Jehovah Jireh will provide ALL our needs for the wedding: Finances, Good Health, Joy for everyone that's involved in the wedding, from us, our families, our helpers, our friends to all our guests.
I stumbled yesterday by arguing with Hun at the most inappropriate time. Was overwhelmed by my own fears and sense of loss that I didn't see his pain anymore. I guess that in the time of stress and heartache, Hun has also misunderstood me. Thinking back, it's funny how we both got upset with each other over the wrong things, we heard each other wrongly and got angry with what we have perceived inaccurately. How the devil will make use of every little opportunity to create strife!
But thank God we reconciled before the end of the day. God's grace was with us, and we prayed together and made up. It's so much easier to focus on God. At least we both have a common source of comfort and we look forward to the same God.
We prayed for our wedding to be an event that will shout His fame and bring glory to Him, and we believe that it will be so!
Frankly, I still don't "feel" assured and settled and still have fears about my wedding not being able to proceed. But I guess faith is not about feelings, I don't have to feel confident to have faith in God. I need to just trust Him. What's facing me now is a wall, and I can't see through to the other side. But if God and bring down the wall of Jericho, I believe He can tear down this wall I'm facing too.
I'll just need to practice FAITH: For All I Trust Him. He is able to do the impossible for us, and I'll just trust that He'll do it :)
This is what we really need now...or maybe I need it even more. Thank God for Hun's mother quick recovery from her surgery. It is already a testimony to God!
Right now, we're faced with uncertainties about our wedding plans. We do not wish to cancel or postpone it. So we're praying and believing that God is in control of our wedding. Yesterday I was encouraged by Dad's prayer for our wedding during family prayer time.
He reminded me that our wedding date, venue and guests were appointed by God himself. So He will provide the means to bring it to completion. Provision means a whole lot more to me now...previously, it was simply finances. But now, I'm believing that my Jehovah Jireh will provide ALL our needs for the wedding: Finances, Good Health, Joy for everyone that's involved in the wedding, from us, our families, our helpers, our friends to all our guests.
I stumbled yesterday by arguing with Hun at the most inappropriate time. Was overwhelmed by my own fears and sense of loss that I didn't see his pain anymore. I guess that in the time of stress and heartache, Hun has also misunderstood me. Thinking back, it's funny how we both got upset with each other over the wrong things, we heard each other wrongly and got angry with what we have perceived inaccurately. How the devil will make use of every little opportunity to create strife!
But thank God we reconciled before the end of the day. God's grace was with us, and we prayed together and made up. It's so much easier to focus on God. At least we both have a common source of comfort and we look forward to the same God.
We prayed for our wedding to be an event that will shout His fame and bring glory to Him, and we believe that it will be so!
Frankly, I still don't "feel" assured and settled and still have fears about my wedding not being able to proceed. But I guess faith is not about feelings, I don't have to feel confident to have faith in God. I need to just trust Him. What's facing me now is a wall, and I can't see through to the other side. But if God and bring down the wall of Jericho, I believe He can tear down this wall I'm facing too.
I'll just need to practice FAITH: For All I Trust Him. He is able to do the impossible for us, and I'll just trust that He'll do it :)
Friday, March 02, 2007
Handling things by myself for the moment
I'll be handling the wedding and housing preps by myself for the moment. Hun needs to be with his family to take care of his mom. Praise God for a successful operation and we'll continue to believe for a speedy full recovery!
It's a funny feeling to "man the fort" alone...guess I've become rather dependent on Hun to make the decision...and I'm actually a little nervous about the responsibility. Will I make the right decisions? Will Hun like it? What happens if I do something wrongly? But still I wanted to give him space as it is indeed a very very difficult and trying time for him right now, and he needs to be there for his family too!
Hun also passed the baton over to me yesterday and told me to make the decisions. We have discussed it before and he said that I knew what we wanted, so just go ahead. Still feeling jittery, but well, if I've gotta do it, I've gotta do it!
Things which I've achieved by myself without Hun:
1. Liaised with and went to the printers for our invitation cards
Things which I'll have to do without him:
1. Meet up with the contractor to look at his drawing plan for us
2. Decide if we wanna engage him as our contractor
3. Meet the sound & AV technician of MM Hotel
Maybe to other brides, it sounds like normal and simple stuff...but I just can't help feeling a little scared. Afterall, I'm so used to doing things together with him and letting him make the decisions while I play the supportive role. But now, I just dun wanna give him additional stress, so I've gotta learn to take the lead for the moment in our wedding preps. But I believe I can do a good job out of it lah...just hope that Hun is happy with the choices that I make...The "big man" gotta listen to the"small woman" for the time being.
Really hope Hun can join me again real soon...I want you to take back the lead! But meanwhile, dun worry about me...give all the attention you need to your family now. When your mom's better, we can continue to prepare for our wedding together :)
It's a funny feeling to "man the fort" alone...guess I've become rather dependent on Hun to make the decision...and I'm actually a little nervous about the responsibility. Will I make the right decisions? Will Hun like it? What happens if I do something wrongly? But still I wanted to give him space as it is indeed a very very difficult and trying time for him right now, and he needs to be there for his family too!
Hun also passed the baton over to me yesterday and told me to make the decisions. We have discussed it before and he said that I knew what we wanted, so just go ahead. Still feeling jittery, but well, if I've gotta do it, I've gotta do it!
Things which I've achieved by myself without Hun:
1. Liaised with and went to the printers for our invitation cards
Things which I'll have to do without him:
1. Meet up with the contractor to look at his drawing plan for us
2. Decide if we wanna engage him as our contractor
3. Meet the sound & AV technician of MM Hotel
Maybe to other brides, it sounds like normal and simple stuff...but I just can't help feeling a little scared. Afterall, I'm so used to doing things together with him and letting him make the decisions while I play the supportive role. But now, I just dun wanna give him additional stress, so I've gotta learn to take the lead for the moment in our wedding preps. But I believe I can do a good job out of it lah...just hope that Hun is happy with the choices that I make...The "big man" gotta listen to the"small woman" for the time being.
Really hope Hun can join me again real soon...I want you to take back the lead! But meanwhile, dun worry about me...give all the attention you need to your family now. When your mom's better, we can continue to prepare for our wedding together :)
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